I need a new cereal.

So instead of blogging about a horrible date, I thought I'd take a different route since this week something special happened. And by "special" I mean a certain man has been a total douche and he will be put on blast.

Story goes as follows:
I kind of liked "Tony the Tiger" a lot, but couldn't do much about it since his good friend was a previous exboyfriend who I will call Cap'n Crunch. But the exboyfriend moved away & got a new girl, so Triple T & I started talking, A LOT. You see, there was text messages & phone calls daily, & I would've enjoyed visits except I live an hour away. There is a reason why I am calling this jerk Tony the Tiger, because 3T is a representative of Frosted Flakes, and this guy is the biggest FLAKE I know. There has been numerous times when I would be on the East Valley & 3T claimed that he wanted to see me. However, Tony the Tiger fell short, and never did see me. Before you start thinking that he just didn't want to see me, your wrong. This guy flakes out on everyone & everything. Even while dating Cap'n Crunch, he would complain on how 3T would never follow through with their plans. So how is it that someone can talk to you practically everyday and tell you that they really like you and want to date you, but yet, they never get around to actually doing it. I thought 3T had changed his ways since for the past 2 months we have been going out on dates. You'd think that all I'm missing is a new relationship status on Facebook, however Facebook pulled a fast one on me. The other night I went online, and did my usual creeping & BAM first thing I see on my News Feed is a mobile upload....a mobile upload of him with a half naked girl with rollerblades on. WOW WOW WOW pump the brakes...is that a caption reading "I'm so in love with this girl." Yup....Frosted Flakes got me good... the other night your talking to me on the phone telling me that you can't wait to see me, and now your in love with stripper girl on wheels while practially gropping her.
Get out of here Tony, you never were "GRRRRREAT!"

Update: 3T & I are no longer Facebook friends, you can have Roller Derby.
Warning: Ladies if you know of a man who happens to be tall, dark, handsome, witty with his words, almost 30, currently living in the Gilbert area & seen with rollerblades, RUN FAST. He's a hoax.

The Good: Who doesn't like Cap'n Crunch!? It's freaking delicious! Should've kept milkin' that one.

The Bad: Tony is what he eats.

The Dirty: Almost naked on rollerblades, put some clothes before someone starts to make it rain.

Someone please roll this one along...

So for my 1st official post I thought I'd start from the very beginning of the horrific dating scene. 

Date #1 "Christopher Reeve"

I met him at some really lame church event. I was 17, he was 19. Really good lookin' guy. Tall, blonde, blue eyed, yeah know California dream boy. We talked, exchanged numbers and a day later I got the call, and the date was set. This is when things go bad...real bad. So the day of our date I never heard from him....uh...did I just get stood up? I guess this was the first sign of disaster. Well ya see here kids, what happened was he had gotten into a really bad car accident a few days prior, and a long story short he had broke both his legs, had surgery, and was expecting a long recovery. Now lets fast forward say 2 weeks and we go out on this date. He was certainly very eager to take me out, however he couldn't drive. So clearly I picked him up. "Christopher Reeve" was pretty embarrassed about me picking him up and helping him around (I mean come on, who wouldn't? The guy is in a wheelchair.) But it didn't matter to me, I was just excited to go out with the Cali dream boat. 

Red Flag #37: "Superman" was trying to hold my hand while he was pushing himself. Uh... Have you ever seen someone push their wheelchair with one hand? It tends to go in a circle.

Red Flag #82: He was being clingy. Gross.

You see where I'm going here!? So by the time we go see this ridiculously lame movie and ice cream after I'm ready to send this one home. But oh boy was I in for a treat! Once I speed him home (he was probably terrified haha poor kid.) Mr. Reeves invites me in. Red Flag #29. SHOULD NOT HAVE GONE INSIDE. His mother sat me down and showed me ALL of his baby pictures. Kill me. And not to mention the stories of him peeing the bed til he was 6, and asking me where I thought he was going on his mission. Oh did I mention they were BOTH planning our wedding. WTF? This is a first date. She wouldn't let me leave. I told her I had to be home by 10pm, and escaped fast! He text me a few times after and I never responded. Don't judge me! I was young, and mean. This should have been the first sign to my soon to be dating life... 

Follow up on Superman: He went on a mission, got married, and now walking. Yay...

The Good: I went on a date with Superman.

The Bad: Having someone roll over your foot on a wheelchair.

The Dirty: Peeing the bed til 6. Nasty. Keep that a secret.